


At My Limit

by Toffle



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: GoT au, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-26
Updated: 2016-04-26
Packaged: 2018-06-04 16:18:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6665608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Toffle/pseuds/Toffle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oikawa Tooru was well aware of the dangers that knowledge could bring as an ambassador to the throne. Yet nothing had prepared him for the consequences.</p>
            </blockquote>





	At My Limit

**Author's Note:**

> Shout out to [Jackidy](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Jackidy/pseuds/Jackidy) who if it wasn't for mer, there would have been a largely different outcome to this story. 
> 
> [Now with art!](http://bluesailsandcalicotails.tumblr.com/post/145556809730/so-the-other-month-i-woke-up-with-the-sudden-idea)

Oikawa's arms flailed, shoved backwards against the sheets by Iwaizumi's strong hands. A crash from behind Oikawa's head had the grins dropping from both their faces. Oikawa turned to look over the edge of the bed.

Iwaizumi leant over Oikawa, pinning him between his arms. They watched the golds and greens of the ornate rug turn scarlet red, the smashed bottle glittering green across the floor in the light from the small framed window.

“This is why we can't have nice things.”

Oikawa twisted to stare up at Iwaizumi. “I'll have you know, you pushed me over.”

“It was your lack of grace that knocked it.”

The bed dipped beneath them as Iwaizumi leaned in closer, adjusting their position to straddle Oikawa's hips. Oikawa leant up to meet his lips, glancing his tongue across the chapped skin. The curve of Iwaizumi's grin stretched wide as Oikawa spoke against his mouth.

“Forget the wine. There's all the time in the world for a drink.”

Iwaizumi chuckled and the sound vibrated through Oikawa's ribs. “Then I guess you won't mind if I finish this.”

Oikawa blinked up as Iwaizumi moved over him, his sight replaced by tanned muscle where Iwaizumi hovered above his head to reach the ottoman at the foot of the bed. Iwaizumi sat back, heavy on Oikawa's waist, with a bronze chalice in hand and a cheeky smirk.

“You never did make a start on it.”

“I was a little pre-occupied.” Oikawa eyed him with a fond smile and Iwaizumi laughed, pink around his cheeks.

Oikawa sat up to rest on his elbow, holding out a hand towards the cup that Iwaizumi kept just out reach above him.

“I believe that's for the guests. If you're several sheets to the wind, how ever do you plan on entertaining me?”

Iwaizumi's eyebrow jumped up. Between the cup in hand and the mess on the floor, he kept the last remains of the wine well out of reach. “Do forgive me, _my lord_ , but you did just dye the carpet red. If you can't be trusted with the bottle, I will have to finish the cup for you.”

Oikawa gaped as Iwaizumi brought the wine to his lips and took several deep gulps. He licked his lips clean and set the cup back on the ottoman behind Oikawa's head, grinning victorious above him.

“You are so... so...”

“So what?”

“Petty!”

Iwaizumi's laughter filled the room from corner to corner, deep and honest, and Oikawa bit his lip in the vain hope of holding back his own amusement.

Oikawa pushed himself up and Iwaizumi dropped back to allow him the room to do so, resting his hands around Oikawa's waist as Oikawa cupped his cheeks and brought their lips back together. The taste of wine was strong against his tongue, Oikawa found he tasted sweet.

“Hajime?”

“Hm... What is it?”

“We shoul- ah...” Iwaizumi's mouth had trailed down from his jaw and his teeth bit sharp against Oikawa's throat.

“Not yet.” They could talk later.

Oikawa carded his hands through Iwaizumi's hair, holding him close as Iwaizumi slid back the fabric of Oikawa's loose shirt, soft linen brushed aside to allow him the curve of Oikawa's neck.

Red marks blossomed across his skin under Iwaizumi's care, and Oikawa huffed against Iwaizumi's temple. “Now all of Westeros will think I'm diseased.”

“Will they be wrong?”

Oikawa shoved his shoulder hard making Iwaizumi grunt. He squeezed his hands around Oikawa's slim waist until a startled yelp escaped him and Oikawa tried to flee through a mouthful of giggles.

“You really are a child, Tooru.”

“Yet you love me as a man.”

Iwaizumi pressed his smile against Oikawa's cheek, then kissed his jaw. “I do.”

Oikawa pushed him back, just slightly, to rest his arms across Iwaizumi's shoulders and tilted his head close to Iwaizumi's ear. He was no longer smiling.

“We must talk and you must listen closely.”

“What have you heard?”

Oikawa's nose bumped the shell of Iwaizumi's ear, tracing the arc up to his hairline.

“They're moving soon. Within the next two months.”

Iwaizumi slid his hands under Oikawa's shirt, up across his tense back and then down along his sides. “You need to return home.”

“As soon as possible. There isn't much time and I fear a delay could put us at a disadvantage. I'll be leaving in the next few days.”

Oikawa turned his head, holding Iwaizumi's face between his hands. His eyes were blown wide and his cheeks were deeply flushed. Oikawa kissed him and Iwaizumi's fingers toyed along the hem of his waistband. They never dipped lower, they never had done in all their time together.

Iwaizumi nipped at his lower lip, tugging gently with his teeth until Oikawa opened his mouth, a silent consent. Needy kisses came hot and heavy, with clacks of teeth as Oikawa realised their time together in future would be short.

Against his mouth, Iwaizumi breathed hard. He tilted his head beneath Oikawa's jaw and Oikawa's hands slipped down to his chest. Under his palm Iwaizumi's heartbeat began to race. Oikawa drew back with a sigh to lay down against the sheets.

“I don't know how quickly I can cross the boarder. I'd prefer it if I were to take you with me, however.” He beckoned to Iwaizumi, who joined him at his side with an unsteady drop. “It's a long journey... but it would be only if you wished it.”

“It may come to that.” Iwaizumi kissed at his shoulder and tugged at the tassels of Oikawa's clothing. He coughed, clearing out his throat. “But not yet. I can't leave just yet.”

“If it comes to it, flee with Mattsun. Cut your loses and make smart choices, Hajime.”

A huff of air fell across Oikawa's shoulder from Iwaizumi's silent laugh. Above him, patterned tiles glinted across the ceiling in the afternoon sunlight. Oikawa angled his head away, closing his eyes from their sight.

Iwaizumi rolled beside him and Oikawa hummed as he bent to mouth open kisses along the length of his neck. There was sparse time to relax and these moments were few and cherished. Oikawa would grab every second he could take at Iwaizumi's side.

Moments like these were not meant to last.

Minutes passed in comfort, the peaceful silence broken but for the sounds of heavy kisses and quiet bickering as Iwaizumi explored Oikawa's body from top to bottom. Oikawa squirmed as his pale skin bloomed poppy red and gained signatures written in purple indents.

When Iwaizumi reached Oikawa's hips, he stopped. He always stopped, and Oikawa felt appreciation in every sense of the word. Iwaizumi sat up, and then he swayed. Oikawa's hand shot up to steady him as Iwaizumi tilted to the side.

“Hajime?”

Iwaizumi set his hand against the sheets for balance and rubbed at his eyes, confused. “I'm alright. Just dizzy.”

“You did inhale that wine.” His words lacked the teasing tone he had wished to use. That had been hardly a cupful and Iwaizumi was not so weak of tolerance to be drunk on that alone.

“Don't insult me.” Iwaizumi smiled down at him and pinched Oikawa's side, earning a whine of complaint. He cleared his throat again, fingers lingering against the skin. “I'm fine now.”

Oikawa sat up, unconvinced, running his hand down the hills of Iwaizumi's arm until he reached Iwaizumi's own buried amongst the sheets. Iwaizumi's head was hot against his as he pressed their foreheads together. He tilted Iwaizumi's chin up.

“You're lying to me.”

“No, I felt fine until this moment.” Iwaizumi's hand shifted beneath Oikawa's, twining their fingers together. “It's just a headache. It will pass.”

“Then lay with me and rest.” Oikawa brushed his thumb across flushed cheeks, a frown etched into his brow as he tried to analyse Iwaizumi's condition.

Iwaizumi leant into his touch, closing his eyes. “You'd have me sleep whilst 'entertaining'?”

“It hasn't been that way for us in a long time.”

“I suppose it hasn't.”

Oikawa shifted, easing Iwaizumi back into the sheets as he misjudged the distance on his own. Iwaizumi waved him off and pulled Oikawa down against his chest by the fabric of his shirt, hanging loose around his elbows.

Iwaizumi's pulse jumped under Oikawa lips, leaving each kiss against his neck more tentative and uncertain than the last. Yet, Iwaizumi continued to pull Oikawa closer, rough hands roaming across his skin, massaging circles against his hips.

Perhaps he was worrying too much. The summers heat had been scorching and even the natives had been suffering from such weather. Iwaizumi's fatigue could be a symptom of the sun. Oikawa hoped that this was the case as unease settled low in his gut.

They laid flush against each other in swathes of silk and linen, warm in the setting sun, and they talked through the passing hour. Iwaizumi's chest rose and fell beneath Oikawa's cheek and Oikawa discussed his day at length, until Iwaizumi's replies became few and his breaths came laboured under Oikawa's ear. He pushed Oikawa away from his chest.

“Tooru... Something's wrong.”

Oikawa leant up. Iwaizumi's skin was still flushed red and tight lines pulled across his brow in worry. He looked to Oikawa all too slowly and fear rose up to clasp around Oikawa's heart.

“I'll go get Mattsun. He'll call a physician.” Oikawa stroked his cheek and swept back the hair from Iwaizumi's fevered skin.

Oikawa pulled himself away and set his feet to the floor. He straightened his clothes, trying to straighten out his thoughts with the action. They raced through his mind as he circled the bed towards the door. Iwaizumi was fine, it was just the effects of the sun, a rotten meal, or... or some disease contracted in this godforsaken building.

Glass crunched underfoot and Oikawa paused at the foot of the bed. Shards of the broken wine bottle sparkled up at him, cast too pretty in orange light and sun fire. Oikawa's stomach plummeted as though the ground had opened up beneath him. The wine had been brought here for him. Iwaizumi should have never had drunk it.

Oikawa closed the distance between the bed and the door in three quick strides and yanked at the handle. The door remained shut, rattling on its hinges.

“No... No, no don't do this.”

Again he pulled. Twisted the brass that clanked at the force to no avail, until Oikawa's fist met with the door in frustration.

“I need to speak with Mattsun. Open the door!”

This wasn't happening.

Oikawa looked to the window. Too small to climb through, too high to draw much attention. There were no streets this side of the brothel, only walls and palm trees. Oikawa kicked at the door, clutching the handle.

“You've made a terrible mistake.”

Had Iwaizumi known? Had he drunk it on purpose? Oikawa shook his head and tried the handle again. Of course he didn't know, he had appeared just as confused as Oikawa. Iwaizumi behind him, curled up against the sheets, short of breath and burning up. Iwaizumi who hadn't known.

Oikawa breathed in and held his chest. He pushed back the fabrics decorating the door and felt his way along the metal work across the wood. There laid the flat metal the served as a peep hole. Oikawa toyed with it until loose enough to reach through and slide it across.

Outside the hall was empty. Doors shut, free from wandering workers who used the surrounding rooms, and not a guard to be found. They were alone. Only the sounds from the floors below and the streets outside filtered up to fill the small hallway with noise.

Alone and ignored.

A cough sounded from the bed and Oikawa spun on his heel as Iwaizumi grasped at his throat, weakly gasping for air. Oikawa left the door and reached Iwaizumi's side in an instant.

“You're okay... Stay with me, Hajime.” Iwaizumi's skin burned beneath his touch and unfocused eyes failed their search for Oikawa's face.

“Tooru...”

Oikawa throat slammed shut and words died on his tongue. His name was a struggled whisper that left Iwaizumi's mouth, too short of breath, too soft. He gripped his hand tight and shrunk against Iwaizumi's shoulder, running his free hand through his short hair.

“I'm here, I've not gone.”

Iwaizumi turned towards him and pressed closer against Oikawa's side. “What... What was in it? The wine.”

“You shouldn't have drunk that, you shouldn't have –” Oikawa bit his tongue and squeezed their hands tighter together. “Did you know?”

Iwaizumi's shook his head, hardly a movement at all to Oikawa's eyes.

“You should...” Iwaizumi's face pinched as he pulled in air, a struggle to string a sentence together. “...should leave.”

As quickly as his draw dropped, Oikawa closed it. “What do you mean? I can't. I can't leave you like this.”

Iwaizumi groaned and drew in a shaky breath. “They'll come... for you.”

“Let them.” Oikawa hung his head, resting it carefully against Iwaizumi's own. A bitter laugh escaped him. “They barred the door.”

“Tooru.”

Iwaizumi's hand wrapped around his arm and squeezed it firm. Oikawa turned his gaze away, up into the forest of Iwaizumi's dark hair.

“What have they done?” A mournful keen slipped out between Oikawa's lips as he pressed them to Iwaizumi's head. “What have I done...? You shouldn't have – I shouldn't have –”

Oikawa leant back as a tremor ran through Iwaizumi's body and Iwaizumi gripped him harder, breath hitching. He shook against Oikawa's chest and Oikawa felt helplessness close in around them with the darkening of the room.

As the tremors stilled, Iwaizumi lifted an unsteady hand to brush his fingers across Oikawa's cheek. He smiled as Oikawa caught sight of the tears dripping from his fingers. Oikawa hadn't noticed when the tears had begun to fall hot and steady.

“Gods, Hajime.” Oikawa released their hands to wrap his arm across Iwaizumi's chest. His erratic heart beat thumped up against his ribs under Oikawa's palm. “I... I don't know how to fix this. I don't have a plan for this.”

“You don't... need... Tooru, you can't.” Iwaizumi's breath caught and he fought to take another. Unable to keep his arm held up any longer, he let it drop to his side and his eyes slid shut. “Tooru, Tooru...”

“I'm here, I'm here,” Oikawa pressed his face against Iwaizumi's cheek and kissed the skin that burned his lips, leaving behind the taste of salt of tears belonging to them both. He reached up to dry them, leaving wet smudges across the curve of Iwaizumi's cheeks. “Don't leave my side, Hajime. The heavens can wait for you yet. The gods won't take you from me.”

Iwaizumi gave him no response, still at Oikawa's side with shallow breaths. Oikawa shivered and the tears fell harder as Oikawa pressed his ear to Iwaizumi's frantic heart. He sat back, lips quivering and teeth chattering with the effort to hold back a sob.

They couldn't take him. They'd had so little time together. Iwaizumi should have never drank godforsaken wine in the first place. This wasn't Iwaizumi's place to die.

Oikawa dragged his hands through his hair, muttering prayers to the Seven under his breath. Please don't take him. Let him live. _And should I die take me in his place, this was never meant for him._

He felt across Iwaizumi's chest for reassurance and scrubbed at his eyes. For however long this would last, Iwaizumi was still alive, still breathing. If the doors would just open, and someone would realise their mistake, perhaps he'd live further still. Oikawa was their target... But who would care for the life a prostitute. One loss would not be a drop in the ocean, so easily replaceable as they were. Not to Oikawa. Iwaizumi was irreplaceable.

If the doors were to open, Oikawa would be killed. Iwaizumi's life would be forfeit too. They wouldn't even check him for a pulse, Oikawa thought with spite heavy on his tongue and a numb acceptance stilling his nerves.

Oikawa eyed the chalice, still sat on the ottoman next to their untouched fruits. Were those poisoned too? How cowardly had they been to take his life in such an impersonal manner? Oikawa was going to die. He was going to die here and there would be nothing in the heavens to stop this, or save Iwaizumi. If that was truly the case... If knife or sword was all that awaited him...

His fingers met the cool metal of the cup before he realised that he had even moved. A mouthful sat at the bottom, pitch as black in the evening light and Oikawa gulped it down as though dying of thirst. If he was to die here, then so be it. Better to be at Iwaizumi's side than held down and gutted.

He let the cup drop against the bedsheets and laid back down, hooking his legs around Iwaizumi's and resting his head on his shoulder. Tremors had taken Iwaizumi once again and Oikawa held him through each one.

Oikawa traced patterns over his chest, symbols of love and seven pointed stars, and words and wishes and prayers. Iwaizumi slipped in and out of consciousness, and his eyelids flickered about the room unseeing until they rolled back and his body seized.

Oikawa jolted away in shock. Iwaizumi convulsed, muscles drawn tight as he shook uncontrollably. Oikawa's hands hovered above his chest, frozen in terror as a sob tore through his throat.

“Hajime...” His voice broke and Oikawa clutched the covers, crying himself hoarse until the dryness of his throat and mouth denied him even that. He choked back tears and prayed for Iwaizumi to be still.

The vibrations through the bed eased off and tentatively Oikawa pressed his hand to Iwaizumi's chest. Oikawa bit his lip, tasting iron amongst the now bitter remains of wine, and leant down to press his ear against Iwaizumi ribs.

He was met with silence.

Gone were the frantic beats of Iwaizumi's heart and Oikawa's head remained unmoved against Iwaizumi's still chest, void of the air he breathed. Oikawa's nails dug crescents into Iwaizumi's skin and a high pitched whine clawed out from his throat.

“Forgive me.”

Oikawa turned and hid his face against the crease of Iwaizumi's arm, lungs burning from harsh cries and greedily taken breaths. His head pounded, loud thumps against his skull, the pulse of his own heartbeat a pale comparison to the sound that he wished to hear. It wasn't fair. They took him.

He used Iwaizumi's shoulders as a brace and pulled himself closer, leaning up press one last chaste kiss against his lips, still warm and not yet cold. For a moment, Oikawa could pretend he was asleep. For a moment, this was all an unfortunate dream.

Oikawa parted their lips, leaning away hardly an inch as his teeth chattered through adrenaline and grief. He smoothed his thumb over Iwaizumi's brow, no longer furrowed in pain but still slick with sweat. The tears that fell against his skin were the rains from the north, and he shivered because it was only the wind that he had warned Iwaizumi would be cold with frost from the hills come winter.

Oikawa folded in on himself. He heaved on air, stomach bruised and aching. By Iwaizumi's arm, he gripped the sheets desperate for something to ground him, but a cavern had swallowed him whole. He should never have pried. He had only himself to blame.

He tucked his head beneath Iwaizumi's chin and wove their legs together once again. Oikawa stared down at Iwaizumi's collar, vacant as he focused on his own racing heart and the flush of his skin against Iwaizumi's cooling body. Oikawa wondered, with little concern, if that was the effect of the wine or the exertion of crying your soul out from your body.

He pressed his nose to Iwaizumi's throat and closed his eyes against the blurring edges of his vision, blindly tracing patterns across Iwaizumi's chest one more time. He whispered prayers against his skin. The only thing he had left.

_I ask of the Father to judge him kindly, to show mercy in his decision. May the Father show him to a heaven that he is deserving of, for he was not deserving of this._

 

\- - -

 

Of all the cruelties in the world to have befallen Oikawa, the clank of the bolt across the door was not one of them. It was the knowledge that time had passed and Oikawa felt no more than dizzy and nauseous, further from death than he had hoped to be when he had drained the cup.

Where Oikawa had lain against Iwaizumi's side, the skin was warm from Oikawa's own heat. His body remained otherwise cold. Oikawa could not move. If he left Iwaizumi's side, then the space between them too would grow cold.

The voices from the door grew closer. Oikawa couldn't make out their words but he waited, waited for the moment they would find him alive and finish this betrayal. It would be better that way. He had no energy left to fight.

A shaking hand reached above his head, closing the eyelids that Oikawa had been too scared to close himself. He hadn't wanted to see Iwaizumi's eyes, staring lifeless across the room. Looking outwards and seeing nothing. Void of their passion and fire.

Warm hands hauled him up and Oikawa reached for Iwaizumi's, icy around his fingers. The world swayed and Oikawa made out the swirling fabrics of the robes belonging to someone he knew. Matsukawa?

He was talking hurried. To Oikawa? To someone else in the room? His voice hitched and caught and Oikawa wondered if they would mourn his death together.

Oikawa flinched as something warm pressed against his mouth, with harried instructions to swallow. There was syrup on his tongue, acidic and sweet and Oikawa drunk without argument, tired, confused, and ill.

Matsukawa continued to talk, to cry, to beg. Each word sounded clearer than the last, yet never clear enough to understand.

“This wasn't... This shouldn't have happened. I'm so sorry.”

Oikawa blinked up at him, owlish and slow to process through addled sickness. What was that supposed to mean?

“I didn't – I never meant for this – ”

What had he done to beg such apology? Surely this was orchestrated against both their wills... Why would have done this? Matsukawa had cared for them deeply. They'd shared bread and salt. There had to be something else. Oikawa could hardly pick the words out through Matsukawa's incoherent stammers.

“They were going to burn us down. There wasn't a choice. I couldn't–”

Oikawa unclenched his hand from Iwaizumi's and raised it to silence Matsukawa, gaunt in the light of the candle lit lantern held by an attendant.

“Hajime is dead.”

Oikawa's voice dragged like gravel across his throat, hoarse and scratched and ruined. The numbness that had seized him began to fade, cooling over, inviting ice into his veins.

“...And you caused this?”

Matsukawa's cheeks were stained wet and he refused to meet Oikawa's eyes.

“This was a mistak –”

“A mistake.” Oikawa looked towards the door, opened wide and oddly free of guards. “Then why don't you finish it.”

Matsukawa took a step back. He turned his head and gestured to his attendant, who approached closer with the light of the lantern.

“This was a mistake, and one that I can no longer follow through with.”

Oikawa closed his eyes and smiled bitterly. This was cruelty.

“Your guards remain out front. I will find another solution... The attendants will take you through the underpass. Go home, Oikawa. Tell them what you must, but go home.”

The attendant helped Oikawa from the bed, steady hands at his sides. His walking stick was pressed into his palm, collected from the floor and cold from lack of use. Oikawa didn't look back as he was lead from the room, but he stopped in the doorway with one last thought on his tongue, sharp and cold and cruel.

“When this place burns, I hope you have the grace to burn with it.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Had an idea the other day all "What if GoT AU where Noble!Oikawa falls in love with a Prostitute!Iwa and everyone gets a broken heart."
> 
> So naturally I shared this idea with[ Jackidy](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Jackidy/pseuds/Jackidy), who helped me with a lot of GoT knowledge, as I actually don't know too much about the story beyond the first couple of seasons.
> 
> I've never actually written character death and angst like this before, so it's out of my comfort zone. Please let me know if this is OOC, and what I can do to improve it so it works better.
> 
> This is part of a larger story, however this whole arc is something I am currently drawing art for. So I wanted this up prior. This idea revolves around Oikawa using his best friends brothel as an information point and consequently falling for Iwaizumi in the process, and what comes of it. I will state Oikawa is asexual, and I hope that came across in writing.


End file.
